Godzilla King of the Monsters
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Godzilla 2000
*** [Cheesy]
Up from the depths...!
The plot (this is usually the part that has people who talk) has Godzilla (lean mean and this time truely green!) showing up on the Japanese mainland again for the we-don't-knowth time, after an absence of we don't know how long. Dogging Godzilla's every move is the Godzilla Prediction Network (GPN). The GPN consists of a geeky scientist named Yuji, his annoying daughter Io, along with an even more annoying whiny reporter named Yuki, all in a tiny Canon and Penzoil endorsed SUV outfitted with an iMac which they use to track Godzilla. Godzilla shows up, eats a ship, destroys a lighthouse, and chases the GPN SUV across the Japanese country side.

Yuki goes back to the newspaper office and gets chewed out for turning in rotten pictures of everything but Godzilla. "Go out and get me some pictures of Godzilla!", screams Pelly White the newspaper editor.

Yuji in the GPN cruiser out for a leasurely drive along the coast...
Meanwhile Katagiri, the evil leader of Japan's Crisis Control Intelligence Agency (CCI) is busy over seeing the plans to raise a gigantic prehistoric metorite from the Japan Trench (Why? Who knows? Who cares?), when he gets word that Godzilla is on his way to trash the city so he calls out the military. Good plan there, Katagiri! The military succeeds only in pissing off Godzilla. All this time the scientists have been trying to raise the metorite with balloons(!)... suddenly the metorite starts rising on its own, bursting the balloons and floating on the surface of the ocean... "I guess it could be hollow.", muses a scientist. No shit, Sherlock, I see why you are a scientist.

Yuki Shows up at the headquarters of the GPN... a dump that is situated over a nasty fish cannery. Io tries to con her into joining the GPN but succeeds only in getting her to buy gas for the SUV. Oh yeah, Godzilla is attacking the nuclear plant! Time for the GPN to spring into action, racing away in their SUV to do... what?... we don't know. Something... Yuji takes his motorcycle. When the GPN get to the nuclear plant a helecopter lands and Katagiri jumps off. Yuji and Katagiri trade barbs and leer at each other. See they used to be friends but now Katagiri wants to destroy Godzilla and Yuji wants to keep him alive(?!) so he can... I don't know... study him or something... If you are confused as to who the bad guy is here then don't worry, so am I.

Godzilla!
The Metorite rises out of the ocean while the Army is trying to destroy Godzilla with some stupid concrete peircing Full Metal Missiles... In a nice move, which I think is Toho's way of showing their middle finger to Tri-Star, the Full Metal Missiles only succeed in pissing Godzilla off further. Finally the rock flies off to attack Godzilla who blows fire on it exposing it to be a metal spacecraft of some sort. while all this is going on, Yuji goes to beach and collects some Godzilla skin samples which later reveal Godzilla's remarkable regeneration ability which Yuji dubs Regenerator G-1. Damn, Yuki, thats the last time we let you name anything!

Damn pesky UFO!
"Great Ceaser's Ghost!", exclaims Pelly White. The space ship has perched itself on top of Yuki's newspaper building where it taps into the Internet and takes over all the Japanese computers and starts downloading all the Godzilla information it can find. Stupid Yuki stays behind hoping to figure out what the aliens are up to. CCI springs into action and decides to blow up the newspaper building... time for Yuji to rescue Yuki. Yucky. Nyuk, nyuk! **FWAP!**

The aliens find out about Regenerator G-1 (I hate you Yuji! I feel so silly saying that)... anyway, something hops out of the spaceship and starts absorbing Regenerator G-1 (aargh) from Godzilla becoming a warped version of Godzilla complete with it's own regenerative qualities. Godzilla and this new monster (the Orga) begin to duke it out, turning Tokyo into a smoldering ruin! Can Godzilla defeat a creature which has his own incredible healing factor?
Yo dude, you ever heard of Scope!

Oh man, this movie was so cool. It just felt right. The real Godzilla at last has come to claim his rightful place from the horrid American pretender. Make no mistake this is the real deal here... Godzilla the way he was intended to be -- a man in a rubber suit plodding through a minature city stepping on toy cars, knocking over cardboard buildings, and kicking ass. Add this to a script filled with wretched, horribly dubbed dialogue and you have the recipe for a great Godzilla movie. But don't get me wrong, apart from a few dodgy CGI effects, the SFX were pretty good. And you just have to see Godzilla's fire breath, it is awsome! The crowning achievement of the film is the underwater swimming sequence.

Although Tri-Star hired a full dubbing crew this time around instead of the same two guys and a chick that have previously dubbed the video releases of the Tri-Star dubbed Heisei era movies, the dialogue still really stunk something awful... I understand some of the truely abominable parts of the dialogue weren't actually in the Japanese version at all, but were written into the American version... Gee thanks Tri-Star. If you left the theater thinking that the dialogue in Godzilla 2000 was a disaster then just remember in the original japanese version, "This missile will go through Godzilla like CRAP through a goose" originally was simply "it will drill through Godzilla's skin, no matter HOW tough he is." They did these dialogue changes all through out the movie and it seems that in every instance it was always to something worse. I didn't mind the stinkers, they made me laugh ... for example, "I wonder why Godzilla protects us when we keep trying to kill him?" [the original was "We humans created Godzilla."] and the ultra cheesy answer, "I guess there is a little Godzilla in all of us." Ugh... what the hell was that? The people who talk intrude again... It would have suited me fine if the only thing on the sound track was the score, the monsters roaring, and the sounds of destruction and suffering. Overall this movie was worth the wait. I didn't mind that the score had been recut with music from Ghidra, The Three Headed Monster and Godzilla vs. Mothra, either. Hearing the Godzilla March while Godzilla strolled through Tokyo sent a chill up my spine. Property destruction was at an all time high in this movie. I have never seen such total waste layed to a city in a long long time... Actually it was two cities but who cares all that really mattered was that Tokyo was decimated.


CREDITS

Gojira ni-sen Mireniamu [Godzilla 2000: Millennium] (1999)

CAST

Yuji Shinoda.................Takehiro Murata
Io Shinoda.......................Mayu Suzuki
Yuki Ichinose..................Naomi Nishida
Mitsuo Katagiri..................Hiroshi Abe
CCI Scientist Miyasaka............Shiro Sano
Godzilla....................Tsutomu Kitagawa

CREW

Exec. Producer................Shogo Tomiyama
Director.......................Takao Okawara
Music......................Takayuki Hattori,
                               Akira Ifukube
Special Effects.................Kenji Suzuki
Screenplay..............Hiroshi Kashiwabara,
                               Wataru Mimura

Running Time: 107 minutes

U.S. VERSION

Released by Sony/TriStar Pictures (2000)

Running Time: Approx. 90 Min.

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